We have been married for over 6 years but we both agree we feel like newly weds. Not in the romantic honeymoon stage but in the arguing and trying to figure out how to live with each other stage. For the first 4 years of our marriage Cole and I were separated for more than half of our marriage. Due to Coles Military and all his deployments we were use to being separated. It was so difficult being apart from the one you love. And it made that reunion so sweet. We loved each other so much and knew that from all our separations. But all the separations are really starting to bite us in the Butt. The first part of our marriage we didn't get the experience like most, where we were able to figure out one another. Have those big fights and work it out. It is so frustrating now because of how long we have been married. We have kids now and we are going through the hard beginning parts of our marriage that most couples would have figured out by now!
Before when we would get in an argument we would most likely yell and walk away from each other. We would calm down and not discuss the problem again. Now that I look back on that I realize how childish and selfish we were. But lately we have been trying to talk it out and discuss our problems/feelings. And even though it has been really good and beneficial for our challenges right now it is super frustrating! It is seriously emotionally draining sitting in a room trying to talk without raising your voice. And expressing how you feel with out screaming out a few cuss words...now that has been a big challenge for me. Sometimes our conversations have lasted hours and I finally want to scream some vulgar words at him and walk out of the room. And i'm pretty sure he feels the same way.
This has been so good for us. We have really had to work on our patience. And that is what i'm finding we need most in our marriage right now. The small things are starting to tick us off. And right now we need to relax and decide what is really important to get upset over and what isn't. I have learned that sometimes I just need to sit back and breath. Getting all flustered and upset isn't doing me or anyone else any good. I'm seriously thinking of finally doing some yoga classes. It will be nothing but beneficial for me. How about you? What are some things you do? What have you done in your marriage to stop the yelling and fighting and having healthier conversations?
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