So I recently found out I have a serious problem.... I'm a people pleaser. Your probably laughing because this isn't a big problem. But it has been a big one for me. I have recently found out that my happiness is determined by others peoples happiness. I care more about making others happy then myself happy. Trust me this is extremely good to have with my career as a cosmetologist. Come to think of it that is probably why I started having this problem. I wasn't always like this. I learned how important it was to keep my clients happy. And I loved doing it. Nothing makes me more happy then when I finish someones hair and they are just beaming and telling me what a great job I did. I love those moments.
But lately I realized how unhealthy I was getting about it. Yes others happiness still matters to me. But I need to also care about my own happiness. Pleasing others isn't always going to make me happy. And sooner or later I'm going to lose my mind. So for the last month I have really been reflecting and thinking of how I am going to fix my problem.
As a mom I found that my emotions affect my families through out the day. If i'm upset and angry my kids get upset and angry through out the day. When I am happy and laughing...so are my kids. My emotions are contagious in my household. I have even seen how they affect Coles emotions too. So I decided it was time to make some changes.
First I decided whose happiness matters the most. And of course Immediately I thought of my boys and Coles happiness. These 3 are my world. My Family, friends and my clients matter as well.
Next I thought about what made me happy before. I use to love shopping for myself. Hanging out with friends. I love getting pampered. You may think I'm crazy but I love working out too. And yes I do these things every once in a while but I don't do them enough. My life reflects around my boys, my husband and my clients. I also need to make sure I care about myself too.
So for the past few weeks I have really worked on changing this. I'm going to make sure I am a little more selfish in doing things that I need and want. Of course I'm being selfish in a good way. My family will always be very important but they don't always have to come first before myself. I have gone shopping for myself and bought new clothes. I have met up with friends and had girls nights. I even went and got a new haircut by one of my friends. (My ends needed some serious help) I'm also getting more ready. Just spending that extra 5 minutes to doll myself up so I feel pretty. It's important to feel pretty as a mom we get so lost in the busy schedule of our kids.
I am also setting a goal of working out more. It's a little tough because I live at my parents for the meantime. My husband is currently applying for a new job in another state that we will be moving to in a month. But i'm hoping I can do a few work outs here and there around the house to help myself feel better fitness wise. Once we move I plan on getting a gym membership.
And so far it is helping. I'm more happy with myself. I'm enjoying my friends company. I'm finding that my happiness really does matter. I'm seeing that those around me are also benefiting from it. I'm not planning on not caring about others happiness. That still really matters to me. But I am finding that I can still achieve both. And I'm a lot happier with the results. So I encourage you if your reading this to make sure that you find that your happiness matters to. Once you have this accomplished you will realize that your happiness affects others too.
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