Meet Hank

Have you ever seen the movie me, myself and Irene? It is a movie staring Jim Carey and how he has a split personality disorder.  He is normally this sweet man that is a police officer and is sweet and respectful to everyone around him.  He is so sweet no one takes him seriously and pushes him around.  Finally one day he snaps and his personality disorder breaks through.  He calls his other self Hank.  Hank has no respect for anyone or anything.  He does what he wants.  The movie has crude humor so if you stay away from those kind of movies don't watch it, I told you the important part of the story line to understand this post.

I only watched it because my good friend told me about this movie and how her husband has a Hank side.  Her husband is a marine buddy of Coles and guess what?! He also has PTSD and has an addiction.  It was interesting talking to her and sharing stories of our husbands and their moments when there addictive side came out.  I loved her bringing this movie to my attention because I never had a name for Cole's addictive side.  I seriously am tempted to start calling it Hank.  "Oh boy this is Hank talking again.  Can I speak to Cole please?"  

Cole is a great guy.  He makes friends easily,  Super funny,  great with kids,  blunt and honest, loyal, hard working, and just all around a good person.  He seriously has so many friends it's hard to keep up with his social life sometimes.

Hank is not such a great guy.  He is quick to anger.  Judges quickly and dislikes people for simple things.  He is quiet and not outgoing.  And usually he influences Cole to drink.  I do not like Hank.

If you have a spouse with an addiction,  seriously any addiction, this post will make since to you.  You love your spouse and the person that they are.  But your spouse has a slight personality disorder because of the addiction.  And it can be so hard at times to figure out how to handle that different person.  You see the person that you love but they aren't acting like the person you love.  I feel your pain and I am so sorry you are dealing with this. (Becuase I totally know your pain.)  But with the proper help and support I am sure I will get through this.  I will learn how to address my spouses Hank.  How to prevent Hank from taking over my spouse.  No I don't think I can fully get rid of Hank but I do believe that I can learn how to live with Hank in a healthy way.  It takes a lot of patience and love to get through this so hopefully you are up for the task too.

I don't like Hank.  But Hank is not going to ruin my happiness or Coles happiness.  I'm on a mission to find a healthy solution to the Hank in my life.